Guns

There was an article in the student paper today about carrying guns. The question throughout the piece was whether students should be allowed to have concealed weapons on campus for protection due to the increase of school shootings. The pro-gun stance was of course they (the students with concealed guns) could protect us if a student started a shooting attack in the same classroom. Maybe I'm a little crazy, but I have a hard time believing this would carry more benefits than negatives. I'll admit I'm not too informed about citizens carrying around concealed weapons. I know that my roommate is very excited for her 21st birthday so she can get a license for carrying concealed weapons. What I do wonder about it whether the weapon is loaded when carried around. I really should hope not, but like I said I don't know much about these things. I just found the Oklahoma requirements for getting a concealed weapon license (the link is the official info). The minimum age is 21, but I did not see information about carrying the gun loaded or unloaded; but according to my roommate you would carry your gun loaded.

Now don't think I'm one of these prissy city girls that hates guns and the NRA. I've shot a rifle and I loved my bb gun I would shot in my backyard. In fact, I have killed with a gun; a rabbit about 30 yards away got a shot to the head once. I think people going hunting is a good thing. Sometimes I think people need to be reconnected with nature and what is a more masculine way for a guy to do that then hunt. I certainly know girls hunt (and if I ever find someone to take me, I want to go hunting), so don't think I'm not calling them masculine. This situation, however, is about the only way I am pro-gun. Showing my liberal bias now, I would love to see handguns being confiscated and make gun shows much more regulated. (Of course, I will acknowledge if some sort of law was enacted to outlaw handguns, the result would be much like our "war on drugs". Handguns would probably just get taken away from the responsible owners and people would just smuggle the handguns in from other areas to be sold on the infamous black markets of our country)

I just am shocked by the "logic" of people. They see a problem like school shootings and think the only way to solve it is to fight fire with fire and carry guns themselves. I see a huge problem with people assuming if they see a student with a gun on campus that the person has it for protection. The desensitization would be very counterproductive. I would have no problem calling the OU police every time on a person with a concealed weapon even if they were ever allowed on campus . I don't care if that person is carrying it for their protection, that gun on their person is not protecting me and in fact by its presence threatening me.

Once again, I just wonder at our nation's maladjustment pattern to big issues. We seem to never address problems full on and just take up side issues or short term solutions (like school vouchers, just pulling our troops out of a mess we created in other countries, mandating health insurance without first revolutionizing the corruption and inadequate coverage of the medical insurance companies). I pray that we find a way to stop these school shooting. I do believe people are good and just need help. Maybe all college students should be mandated to one counseling session per semester. Maybe we should have health screenings. I don't know. I do know that the answer is NOT more guns on campus.

-Kristy

PS. when I was trying to find gun statistics, I found this lovely little site. According to its logic, if I would become a doctor I would kill more people that guns...The site of course never thinks of how many of the patients the doctor treat would be from gun wounds.

Death!

Currently I am taking a philosophy class. I was really excited to start this class, partly due to my suspicion that I would love a topic whose sole topic is speculating about things that are unknown. I love to think about concepts and abstract things, so I thought this would be fun. The class was titled Philosophy and Literature with a description summery stating we would be reading literature and focusing on the philosophical nature of the stories. Thinking, Reading, and Discussion... some of my favorite activities! I arrive to the class and find all of the literature would be focusing on one theme: death.

At first I thought the rest of my Tuesday and Thursday afternoons would be depressing due to this subject being discussed for an hour and a half, but in many respects I've found it quite the contrary. The first book we read is The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Leo Tolestoy. While hating the main character at first, the story of Ivan grew on me and made me very conscience of my life, especially pertaining to the way it was being lived. In many ways after leaving this class, I seem to have a deeper passion for life and a fervor to be conscientiously insuring I am doing all that I deem necessary and good, because I could indeed die tomorrow.

During my first class session, my professor addressed some of the reasons for anxiety about death. One of my favorite things I have ever heard a person talk about was her discussion on the anxiety some experience over what could become of your body after you die. She was saying how this is a valid concern for many when thinking of death. She gave an example to illustrate a reason for the fear (which this was the best part). She said hypothetically she dies, her children decide to have her body preserved by a taxidermist, and then place her in the living room for display! (oh, I love the irony of a dead body in a LIVING room). Then years go by, my professor's children die and her preserved body is sold in a yard sale and she ends up in a frat house! I am laughing SO hard at this point with the visuals I have of a preserved body being in the corner of a frat house while crazy drunken frat boys are running all over the room. This is quite possibly one of the most disturbing yet hilarious thing I had ever heard. The horror of this situation is of course her helplessness of stopping it.

During this class I realized I am totally at ease with my mortality. This is probably due to this childhood fear I had of dying at the age of 16. This fear results from often being told often when I was young that I resembled my aunt Elaine that died when she was 16 in an accident. I guess it was just my childish logic, but I figured that since everyone told me I was so much like her I might meet an accidental death at the age of 16 as well. I never thought about this often; it was just something in the back of my head and apparently never told anyone about this until I mentioned it once in some conversation. Hope none of you think differently of my now...

As Christians we also talk about death, but it is much more in the context of the heaven afterlife we are promised. Once I started reexamining fundamental parts of Christianity according to different doctrines and common practice about 3 years ago, I've been stuck on the issue of heaven. I certainly do not agree with the "turn or burn" method of preaching I've seen occasionally. For one among other reasons, I don't think taking on the lifestyle of Jesus is based on staying out of hell, but bringing peace and as Brian McLaren says in The Secret Message of Jesus "a little piece of heaven to earth". I honestly don't know if I am certain there is a heaven after this life is over. I sometimes feel like people need this concept of heaven for a sense of comfort and a goal to work toward, like they need an ultimate reward for putting up with all of those trying people on earth and helping all of those sinners. I don't like the phrase of "earning my crowns in heaven" and others people mention while doing tasks they don't deem as pleasant or instantly rewarding. People are people, no matter their religious creed, race, or sex and deserve just treatment like everyone else. Sometimes I think that gets lost when just looking at the afterlife.

Just a couple more thoughts on death, then I'm wrapping this up (I promise). One interesting debate we had in the first days of class was how the belief in an afterlife can effect the way a person lives their life. If I don't believe there is anything after this life, I might be much more prone to do WHATEVER I deem fun, worthwhile, and needed. This freedom results in some ways from not worrying about punishment/justification aspect in the afterlife. On the other hand, a person that staunchly believes in an afterlife might have no problem dying prematurely (which another interesting concept I don't go into now) in an act of martyrdom. And of course the more normal example is the exact opposite of the first, a person denying themselves morally ambiguous activities (which could range from drinking alcohol, eating pork, having sex before marriage, smoking) to ensure their good standing in the afterlife.

I guess the great thing about this class is how deeply it makes a person look at the direction of their life and make sure it is one which they may not horribly regret. May we stop today and take a moment to be a little introspective, examining our lives to make sure we are living them to the fullest. May we never end like Ivan Ilyich in the conclusion of the book by realizing on our death bed we chased after the wrong things and missed out on what life really is about.

-Kristy

Hate

Hate takes a lot of energy. Maybe that's why we are told not to hate. I have always hated a certain holiday. I feel compelled to explain myself every time someone asks me why. Explaining that you don't like a day supposedly about love due to the commercialization and unimaginative ways its celebrated takes quite a while to convince them there is no bitterness rooted in that hate. In some ways I wonder if I'm being like the little kid that makes it a little too obvious that he "hates" the girl he in actuality likes quite a bit.

I am a hopeless romantic and have been for quite awhile, but I've developed a hard shell to possibly stop all of the hurt I've acquired being overly romantic. Today I decided I'm going to get rid of that hardened cynical shell and just have fun. Life is about experiences and sometimes those are getting hurt. And sometimes that hurt comes from letting someone close, but keeping people at a distance isn't the way to live. Just something I decided this morning. No more energy devoted toward a cultural phenomenon I can't stop. Just going to do what I deem appropriate. That's about it. May we all have the courage to do something we have avoided to keep us from hurt.

-Kristy

Poem

So, irony has always been my favorite form of literature. I'm sure lots of you may find it ironic that this zoology major has attempted to be poetic, so please don't be too harsh. I like it. Maybe you will too.


Colors
Anticipation, excitement
Like a bright bubbling pink
reminiscent of young girls
giggling loudly at their inside
joke being played on adults

Patience, waiting
feeling as dark as night
taught these are virtues
something to be conditioned
much like a monk content without food

Which emotion to indulge?
Which action to take?
Risk all prudence to go full speed
and potentially find lacking
Or endure the happy thoughts
and lay around for events to be put into motion

The answer must lie in between
Not in the pink or night black
Maybe in the green or yellow or even blue.
The unknown is frustrating.
The unknown is exhilarating.
The unknown is life.

Life is certainly full of colors!
Our lives must be dependent on how we use the colors.
Once dead, the remainder of our lives resembling a magnificent quilt
and hopefully not too many holes are present.


-Kristy

love......?!?

Voltaire has a quote saying "It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue."

I have to admit when I found that quote I laughed rather hard. I think that would be a great phrase for a Valentine Card. I'll have to make one and patent it! The word relationship and all of the surrounding connotations has been on my mind lately. I decided to kind of throw myself back into the dating realm lately and have found that things are much more complex then when I was dating in high school. It is amazing to me how many different reasons people seem have when desiring a dating relationship with a person of the opposite sex (or even the same sex for some I know).

When in high school, it was pretty simple because dating mainly entailed of hanging out with your friends, going to dances together, talking on the phone, and spending some time alone when your parents allowed it or when you were able to sneak away for a couple of hours. But now, the idea of dating isn't that easy. The average college student is stressed and looking to the future, so starting a relationship can be for all sorts of reasons, ranging from the physical-stress-reliever kind to the I-want-to-find-some-one-to-marry kind. And I guess one thing I've realized is that the guy doesn't seem to just come up to you and say, "Hey, I just want to talk to you for awhile to confuse you as to what my intentions are, act like I'm really interested, make you realize how sweet I can be, and then I stop answering your calls, acting like I never knew you. Sound good?" I think I would appreciate the frankness much more than the person doing just that. And I hope I don't sound bitter! I'm just a little frustrated.

Should a girl just continue to wait for her Mr. Darcy to knock on her door or does she really have to put up with the Mr. Wickhams, Mr. Willoughbys and other scoundrels before she can find and fully appreciate the one for her.

I spent a week this summer during which most of the nights were spent in conversations with many college girls contemplating all of the issues involving marriage. Our boss had posed the thought to us that God may have planned for us not to have husbands, which truly broke our hopeless romantic hearts. I do feel like girls are all brought up thinking it is only a matter in time before our shining knight on a horse rescues us like in the old Arthurian tales. I always thought it was so interesting how Paul was very adamant in the Bible mentioning that it is better for people to stay unmarried. These statements very abrasive to the Disney movie damsel in distress plots.

How in the world does a person go about deciding for themselves what kind of actions to take on these types of issues? For the last two years, I didn't think about it much. I just pushed it all toward the back of my head and concentrated on clarifying my wishes for the future, my values, and establishing myself as an adult.

As of late, I've been thinking about it more and resulted in reading a lot from Song of Songs, a book called Sex God (which the title makes it sound much dirtier than its innocent contents), observing other people in their relationships, and most of all contemplating the purpose and value of it all. I guess much like my stance on alcohol from my last blog, the jury still seems to be out. I certainly see nearly all of the advantages and negatives, but most of all wonder if I am selling myself short. I have never wanted to be perceived as a girl that is codependent, so I have taken many actions to show that I am independent and strong. I just wonder if I am avoiding the issue due to its complex nature. I know I'll keep struggling with this one for awhile. I guess I just wanted to admit to my blog what I've been really preoccupied with during the last month. I'm not sure I'm really asking for comments on this one....but feel free if you wanna. I'll just leave with this thought. May we all continue to work on the situations that are complex and not just take the easy position of ignoring them. I know I'm trying to fight this one. Love you all.
-Kristy